Strength, Faith, and Family: My Mother’s Battle with Alzheimer’s
A Personal Battle with Alzheimer’s Disease
Alzheimer’s disease is a cruel thief. It robs memories, erodes personalities, and leaves families grappling with loss long before the final goodbye. It is a journey that countless families face, but each experience is unique and deeply personal. For me, the story of Alzheimer’s is not just a statistic or a medical diagnosis; it is the story of my mother, a vibrant and loving woman who was diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimer’s at the age of 59, and my grandmother, who also battled this devastating disease for several years.
The Devastating Diagnosis: Early-Onset Alzheimer’s
The changes in my mother were sudden and disorienting. She had always been an active, involved, and deeply caring person, someone who threw herself into everything her children and grandchildren did. But then, almost overnight, her demeanor began to shift. We feared the worst—a stroke, perhaps. We embarked on a journey through the maze of neurology, seeking answers, hoping against hope that it would be something—anything—else. But several months later, at the Mayo Clinic, we received the diagnosis we had dreaded: early-onset Alzheimer’s.
I remember that day with a clarity that cuts through the fog of time. My dad, my mom, and I were driving home from the clinic, the car heavy with silence. For the first hour, none of us spoke. We were each lost in our thoughts, trying to process the reality that had just been handed to us. Finally, I couldn’t take it anymore. I asked my mom if there was anything in particular she wanted to do with the time she had left. Her answer was simple, yet profound: “The only thing I want is to be with my family.”
Coping with Alzheimer’s as a Family
And that’s exactly what she did. My mother lived out the rest of her days surrounded by the people she loved most. Despite the relentless progression of the disease, she remained active and involved in our lives until the very end. Her faith in God, which had always been the bedrock of her life, never wavered. In fact, it was during that silent car ride home that she turned to me and said, “I’m not worried about this. You don’t be worried about this either.” It was a powerful statement, one that spoke volumes about her strength, her faith, and her determination to live life on her terms.
A Mother’s Strength: Cherishing Every Moment
Just ten days before she passed away at the age of 61, my mother did something extraordinary. Despite her declining health, she walked the entire route of the Sioux Falls Alzheimer’s Walk, a mile-long journey that seemed impossible for someone in her condition. I had brought a wheelchair, thinking she would need it, but she refused. “I’m here for a reason, and I’m going to walk,” she said. And walk she did. The wheelchair, as it turned out, was more for my four-year-old twins, Kayleigh and Kenleigh, who rode in it as my mother completed the walk with a determination that still takes my breath away.
A few days later, she attended my niece’s volleyball game, another testament to her unwavering commitment to being present for her family. And then, one night, she went to sleep and never woke up. She had always feared the prospect of a nursing home, and I am grateful that we never had to face that reality. I always wanted her to know who we were, her children and grandchildren, and by God’s grace, she did until the very end.
Coping with the Impact of Alzheimer’s
Living without my mom has been incredibly difficult. There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t look to her for guidance. But perhaps the hardest part about losing her is knowing how much she is missing out on as my kids are growing up. She was so involved in our lives that her absence is felt deeply every day. My oldest daughter, Kaitlyn, was just eight years old when she passed, and while she has some beautiful memories of her grandma, there is so much more I wish they could have shared together. My twins, Kayleigh and Kenleigh, who were just four years old at the time, have only fleeting memories. But the most painful reality is that my youngest daughter, Karsyn, never got to know her at all. I often think about how much my mom would have loved to see them grow, to cheer them on at their games, to share in their achievements, and to simply be there as they navigate life. It’s a loss that cuts deeply because I know how much she would have cherished every moment with them.
Supporting the Alzheimer’s Association: A Personal Mission
Because of my family’s experience, I am a strong supporter of the Alzheimer’s Association. I participate in local walks and contribute to the cause because I have seen firsthand the devastating effects this horrible disease has on loved ones. My grandmother’s long battle and death with Alzheimer’s, followed by my mother’s diagnosis and eventual passing after just two years, has deeply impacted me. I am committed to fighting this disease, not just for my mother and grandmother, but for everyone who has been touched by Alzheimer’s. It is a disease that I hope never to face myself, and one that I don’t want my children to endure watching me go through.
Alzheimer’s is a devastating disease, and there is still so much we don’t understand about it. But what I do know is this: my mother lived her life fully, even in the face of this terrible diagnosis. She taught me that even when life takes an unexpected and heartbreaking turn, we can still choose to live with purpose, love, and faith. And for that, I will always be grateful.
~Michelle
